Book I - page 14

I feel so off lately, i should be dancing on clouds after what Jerry told me but it is as if something is clouding my mind.

I was shocked to hear the words come over his lips, i did not expect him to be the one to tell me such.
I am trying not to give in fully cause i know it is the light dead overheals love, not the deep and life changing one, cause Jerry is like me and when the roses settle then he will be gone to greener pastures.

But i am happy now... I just cant shake that nagging feeling that we are closer to the end than i can see?

Why cant i just be happy, everything should be perfect, but then why am i sitting here writing looking over at him snorring lightly in the bed.
The night was amazing and so deep and intense like nothing i have ever felt before.
The whispers in eachothers ears afterwards confying in our love.

At the moment he is mine and i am his... But can i trust his words? Is here something he is not telling me?

I love him... He loves me... only a question of how long...

Book I - page 13

I have not been able to find Jerome, so i think ill go place a letter at his roome st the Keg. To tell him i want to see him... I need more of him than theses fleeting moments...

I miss him so when we are parted... Am i getting in over my head?

Book I - page 12

I have not written in a while, nor has a lot happened.
I have been with Qill for a while, why did i not reach out and tell Jerry where i was and why i had left? Am i that heartless?
I really care for him, i didnt think he had stayed true to me as i had told him nothing, just left.

But i saw him at the party. It was something about strengthening the bonds between our the guilds; The Scorched Oath, Starlight and Redemption Corona, well didnt see many from Redemption and some of the Starlighters were just plain snobs.

It was so hard to restrain myself from not jumping Jerry right in the middle of it all, when i saw him i felt how deeply i had really missed him.
I did not dare go to him as i was unsure how he felt about me at the time, but he came over, told me he had missed me. My heart filled with joy right there and then... I need to be carefull, i feel so strongly but i know how easilly a heart breaks... I feel it constantly with Qill almost as if it was my own pain and loss yet i have never meet this man she lost her heart to.

The dark presence i have been feeling i get grows stronger at times then weaker yet still i have no idear what it can be.

I need Jerry and if Rain cant take that he has a new woman, if she tries anything... well lets just say i had nothing else to do on that bloody ship than practice...

Book I - page 11

It is good to be back i have really missed Jerry. He talked to Qill while i went home to freshen up. He seemed a little distant when he returned... At first...
But then it turned hot like it always does between us...
I have been so busy of late i need to find Jerry and appoligies...
And that presence i felt last night so strong and powerfull... So inticing...
It affected me deeply through my essence... I need to find out more...

Book I - page 10

This is so booorrriiinnngg i could just scream.
Qill seems to think that there is something wrong something not as it is suppose to. She seems worried though she tries to not let me know.

I miss Jerry actually think he means a little too much.
Funny how the hunger is gone here.

I cant help but wonder how he is behaving with me away for so long?

Ohh well not much to do about it... He must have a million questions as well but i dont know how to anwer them myself.

I think Qill knows more than she wants to let me know. I dont ask i know that it is not to hurt me, but how can i be so sure in that? Well i just am without a doubt. Beeing so close to her it sometimes feels like i am a part of her, her emotions and thoughts so clear to me.

I know she is different, the shadows, the tatoos over her body well only two are visiable, out here she wears them so proudly. I like to see her like this, she seems at peace for the first time in a very long time.

When she goes to train Diigar in that dark place, she always returns so happy, i swear the shadows does not want to let her go when she steppes through that dark portal every time she returns.

It is peacefull here and since i have come on the boat i only feel the cold when she is gone to be with Diigar.

I even asked if Jerry could come here to us, i would like her to meet him and wise versa but she said it had to wait until we return to the city.. soon.

She asked me a couple of times to take the collar of but when i do she becomes so concerned, i see the darkness fill her eyes, like someone has poured shadows into her eyes... living shadow swirling around until her eyes are all black. Is that what Jerry was talking about? Do my eyes do that as well?

She seems to know everything... this connection we share seems so strong, i dont mind it i will not hurt me in any way, i just wonder.

Qill will tell me when she has it all sorted she has told me... I swaer sometimes i almost think she is my mother, she sure acts like it at times.

Book I - page 9

I like my new place in Ironforge, the bed of stone, the walls as thick as the mountain itself to keep all sounds out... or in...

We have had a pretty intence time and it seems we are almost equals, the challange i mean.
When the healing potions stop helping but we still burnd strong.
By the nethers my body will be bruised for weeks and well no riding in the near future for me.

I think he would have won if it haden been for that strange hunger inside me, my body screamed for me to stop long before he actually quenched my thirst.

I bid him to hard the blood... why did it feel so right?

I dare not think about what he must have thought...
Why is my passion do deep.. and dark it feels almost unatural.

Strange i feel as if i need to go see her. something feels urgent. This sence of connection it is like what they talk of between twins, but we are not related? we are not twins?
It goes deeper than her magical link to me that lets us speak, and why can i also reach Diigar, she said it was our link?

My dreams have started... some would call them nightmares, the shadows reaching out for me almost like a lovers caress, i feel no fear of them...

Argh yes yes why so urgent... well she want me to come now... I am really not looking forward to that trip...

Better leave Jer a note telling him i will be aw...
Oh well no time i will send it when i get there.

Book I - page 8

I think i worry him... maybe he is not how i thought he would be?
But do i dare trust him... let down my guard... no to early still... not going to make that mistake twice.

I dont know what the neather is going on between those two but they need to sort it out... firends are what is most precious in the world.
And then that friend of his goes and call me easy, what the feck does he know. I might be a tease but i am not some kinf of floosy.

I know how i come of, but i am not as bad as i can seem...

I really like him, maybe more than i should but i keep myself safe... it is too easy to get hurt...

But i am looking forward to seeing him.. I send him a letter to let him know where i am staying now.
I think he will like the house my mistress gave me.

Book I - page 7

Yes yes he is back and well those potions i sent him, kinda came in handy last night.
Shame about the bed though, ohh well i have the money to take care of that.. Not sure that inkeepes is going to let us stay here much longer, seems we are scarring the guest...
Hmm maybe i should find something for myself? But the thought of something permanat dosent really suit me well.
I know my mistress has a lot of hideouts, may borrow one of them for my own?
Think i need to talk to her about this, plus i am all out of that special ink she told me to write with so need to get some more from her.

Book I - page 6

I feel on fire again, and it is like it want to eat me from the inside out... What by the neathers is all this?
Ohh well ill take that fight when it becomes tangable.

So Cutie liked my letter... So i just had to send him another... who would have thought this could be fun, but it is... well not fun ha ha but more fun Grr i am going to eat you up.

Hmm i am bad for playing with the thought of going up there knowing that both of them would be there, get them away from the others, men always hunger when they are out on adventure...
Well i think that little thought will only lengthen the feel of time before Cutie gets back.
But hay you cant blaime a girl for wanting the best and Cutie and Handsome together, well would indeed be a challange.. maybe more than i am bargining for if it were? Nah i would be up for it.

I think i need to take a cold... very cold swim or well maybe i should just go to bed, now...

After all my mistriss is not really making things easy at the moment, i wounder what she is up to with all the studying... What has she found in them old books.

Book I - page 5

I went to the Golden Keg to look for Cutie hoping i might catch him before he left, but he had left a note for me already saying he had leaft early morning.
I got something to drink feeling in an all to playfull mood, then that friend of his walks in, that darkhaird handsome one.
How could one resist teasing him... Just to find out if he could be swayed from what ever little girl he properly has at home waiting for him all lovy dovy and all.
He wantet me that i am sure of but he stayed civil... Those eyes of him running over my body...
Hmm if Cutie should ever find someone else i think i need to try harder with this one.
I think if i really set my mind to it i could turn his mind...
Hmm another challenge if it dosent work with Cutie and me.

Well i just cant wait for him to come back... i really need to get us started on that little challange of ours... Mmm he is so fine...

Think i will send him a little letter for when he gets back... Just to get him... going.

Book I - page 4

Was a busy day yesterday but i still managed to run into Cutie... He drives me crasy... That teasing smile and the Desire in his eyes i just want to ravage him over and over and Well have him do the same to me... I vant get enough of him...
Yet i still needed to go, pr she would kill me...
Hmm and there was this dark handsome stranger, to bad he wasent into more din but Well i have my hands full with Jerry as it is... For now...

I am sure looking forward to that little challange...

Book I - page 3

The burning inside has lessened... Is it his fault or something else?

If it had not been my room i would hav sneaked away, like i use to when things get to personal. No need for complications and they always get complicated when men are involved, somebody ending up hurt.

But by the neathers our passion is world shattering, so intense so full of desire and longing.

He wants to be exclusive, will he be the one to be able to? Men always wants to posses yet their are they ones to break when an alluring smile and a pair of blue eyes surounded by fluttering eyelashes and a subtle body is near.

Well i think i will just put aside all my sceptisim and enjoy him to the fullest for now... Save the worries for another day, another drink...

Wonder if he is up for seconds...? or well is it fifths? Not that he is going to have a saying in it anyways...

Book I - page 2

Hmm he was indeed worth finding again Jerome Walker, Cutie. Seems Dii knows of him.

We had the most mind-blowing sex and well though that was all he wanted so i left but next thing i know we are sitting by the pond talking about everyday stuff.

The meeting was a bore as usual not sure what i am doing there...

Cutie is going away for a couple of days... shame, i would really like more of that tail...
We have a lot in common so i am interesting in where this will lead... but one day at a time.

Book I - page 1

It has been a very interesting day... For some reason i feel so free?
Ohh well it is a nice day in Stormwind and when my mistress suggested that i should write a journal i agreed it was a good idear.

Hmm i have been in the Scorched Oath for some time now but i am not sure i really fit in, i dont really talk to the other members well besides Dii but he is my mistresses and besides elves dosent really do anyhting for me.

I meet the most intriging man by the pond... he was such a tease...
I think i need to find him again and take it to the next level... if he dares.